My Other Half

Welcome to the February Carnival of Natural Parenting: Parenting Essentials

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama. This month our participants have shared the parenting essentials that they could not live without. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.


Lying in bed, a barrage of worries shoots through my head about my unborn baby, everything from teaching her how to ride a bike, making friends, dealing with bullies, teaching her German and English to flying internationally, disciplining her, and inadvertently passing on my fears. I was completely overwhelmed. Then I remembered who was sleeping next to me: I cannot imagine parenting without my husband.

What a relief to realize that she has a dad and a mom to help her with her science fair projects, make friends and learn new skills. We balance each other out. As shown above, I’m very prone to worrying, cautious and by-the-book kind of mother. He seeks out new ways to challenge, teach, and play with our daughter.

These two simple examples illustrate our differences further:

Mom’s take: As a new mother, I was over protective of my newborn and would always support her neck.

Dad’s take: By the time our daughter was three months old, she was used to Dad hanging her playfully upside-down by her legs. He continually challenged her neck strength starting when she was about two months old.

Mom’s take: I am always worried about her choking on food. I would (still guilty) cut her food into tiny bite size pieces.

Dad’s take: Starting when she was six months old, he would give her huge spoonfuls of cereal and purees. He cuts her food into big chunks and offers her one grape after another until her mouth is full. It is a challenge for her to keep up, but when she is hungry, her mouth is always wide open.

It’s a good balance, but at times we don’t follow these personality traits. Sometimes he’s more resistant to change and I’m more willing to teach her something new. I’m loosening up on my by-the-book personality as I become more acclimated to motherhood. He gets increasingly frustrated while trying to teach her something new, and I am able to step in to remind him of her developmental stages. We are able to help each other with our weaknesses and strengths. Having my husband parent by my side helps me relax a little and enjoy the ride.


Carnival of Natural Parenting -- Hobo Mama and Code Name: MamaVisit Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

  • Not Without Him — The love Starr at Taking Time shares with her husband is the foundation of her parenting.
  • I Cannot Imagine Parenting Without B(.)(.)bs — From an uneducated dreamer to a breastfeeding mother of a toddler, nursing has forever changed Kristy at Strings to Things’s relationship with her daughter and her outlook on life.
  • Raising a Child in the Internet Village — When Jenn at Monkey Butt Junction has a question or concern about parenting, she turns to the Internet. What did parents do before Google?
  • Partner in Crime and ParentingBethy at Bounce Me to the Moon can’t imagine parenting without her husband’s sense of humor – he brings her laughter and love every day.)
  • I Make MilkPatti at Jazzy Mama can’t imagine trying to mother her babies without her breasts, but she could do it if she had to.
  • New Perspectives Bring New BeginningsMJ at Wander Wonder Discover, who is a former authoritarian mamma, has gained perspective via parenting.
  • Time Out!Mrs. Green at Little Green Blog explores how time apart can increase your capacity to give unconditionally.
  • Unimaginable Without HimKristina at heyred designs is celebrating her amazing partner, without whom none of her parenting experience would be possible.
  • My Parenting NecessityClaire at The Adventures of Lactating Girl needs “me time” in order to be the Mama she wants to be.
  • Babywearing As a Way of LifeDarcel at The Mahogany Way talks about the benefits of babywearing in everyday life.
  • Parenting Partnership — Sometimes Abbie at Farmer’s Daughter doesn’t appreciate her husband enough, but she definitely couldn’t imagine parenting without his help.
  • Parenting EssentialsMomma Jorje loves her parenting products, but she needs you even more.
  • My Parenting Must-Have: SupportJoella at Fine and Fair wrote a letter to her daughter about the role that support from friends and family plays in her mothering.
  • It’s More Than Just Hair — Think doing hair is full of fluff? Too girly? Useless? Karli from Curly Hairdo Ideas used to think so too.
  • The Minimalist Parent — The parents at Living Peacefully with Children embrace a minimalist perspective when it comes to baby gear. A good sling is all they need.
  • Without My BreastsCharise at I Thought I Knew Mama can’t imagine parenting without her breasts; here’s why.
  • Loves Books, Loves PeopleSeonaid at the Practical Dilettante discovers that the library is a perfect fit for her family’s needs.
  • An Ode to the Maya WrapRevMama’s next child might be named Maya, because of her fondness for the sling.
  • Avoiding the Padded RoomPecky at Benny and Bex is here to testify that it takes a village to raise a child.
  • My parenting essentials, from Tivo to battery-operated monstrositiesLauren at Hobo Mama presents a list of parenting essentials you didn’t even know you needed (and probably don’t…).
  • Attachment Parenting Through Separation: It Makes It a Little BetterJessica at This Is Worthwhile talks about how she couldn’t survive her separation without attachment parenting and the bond it’s afforded her with her 3 year old son.
  • Parenting EssentialsDeb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now shares the principles she used to parent her children from infants to adults.
  • My Parenting Essentials — The things that are truly essential to Kim at In Desperate Need of Entertainment aren’t things at all.
  • I’m No One Without My Sling — How baby carrying is essential to the parenting of Jessica Claire at Crunchy-Chewy Mama.
  • I Cannot Imagine Parenting Without…Isil at Smiling Like Sunshine talks about what she needs to raise her children.
  • February Carnival of Natural Parenting — Through her experiences over the last five and a half years, Casey at Love What Is has discovered her most important tool for parenting is using her instincts.
  • CNP: I Cannot Imagine Parenting Without __________.The Artsymama discloses the one thing that gave her back control of herself as a parent.
  • Laugh Until I Cry — Laughing with her sons keeps Acacia at Fingerpaint & Superheroes connected and grounded.
  • I Cannot Imagine Parenting WithoutLuschka at Diary of a First Child realizes what the one thing she can’t imagine parenting without is, and it turns out it’s not a thing after all.
  • It Takes Two — Here are a few of the reasons why Jenn at Adventures Down Under cannot imagine parenting without her fabulous husband.
  • Stopping to Listen — Though it wasn’t easy at first, Knocked Up – Knocked Over cannot imagine parenting her daughter without listening first to what she is telling her.
  • The Essence of Parenting — There are many wonderful resources that make life easier for Michelle at the Parent Vortex to parent, but the essence is the relationship between parent and child.
  • What I Cannot Live WithoutSybil at Musings of a Milk Maker considers her computer to be a parenting lifeline.
  • True Blessings: White Noise and GrandparentsKat at Loving {Almost} Every Moment can’t live without her white noise machine and the support of her parents.
  • The Necessities! — What “stuff” does a natural parent like Lily, aka Witch Mom really need? Not much, it turns out.
  • Mama Showed MeMama Mo at Attached at the Nip writes about how parenting wisdom is passed on by example.
  • Ode to the Loo — For Joni Rae at Tales of a Kitchen Witch, the bathroom is her safe place, where she can take a minute to calm down if she is feeling touched out.
  • Go, Mama. Go!Andrea!!! at Ella-Bean & Co. has been able to integrate her many roles through her get-up-and-go parenting essential, exercise!
  • My Other HalfBecky at Old New Legacy realizes what a relief it is to have her husband parent alongside her.
  • Grace, Love, and CoffeeMrsH at Fleeting Moments realizes that lifelines can take the form of the profound, or the mundane. Both are ok.
  • Supportive Spouse, Check! — There are so many parenting tools and gadgets that are superfluous, but the one essential, for Danielle at, has been her supportive spouse.
  • Why I’m a BabywearerMeredith at Becoming Mamas reflects on the ways babywearing has enhanced her mama baby relationship…and made life easier to boot.
  • It’s Marvelous Out Here, Kiddo!Rachael at The Variegated Life can’t imagine parenting in the big city without the marvels of Prospect Park to share with her Critter.
  • Yes, Thank YouAmy at Anktangle offers tips on how to ask for and accept help, an essential for successful parenting.
  • Parenting Essentials Checklist: Mom’s Inner Rebel and Her Kids’ VoicesOlivia at Write About Birth reflects on raising global citizens and saying no to societal norms.
  • Eco-Mama Online! — An Eco-Mama living in the mountains of a nature island, Terri at Child of the Nature Isle finds it essential to connect to nature and to connect online.
  • Sorry, We Just Sold the Last OneNev at The Adventures of Lime confesses she missed out the day they handed out patience.
  • LaughTashmica at The Mother Flippin’ Blog reveals her super power, her talisman agains mean mommy.
  • My Priceless Parenting Resource — What do books, a magazine community, my mother and the local playgroup have in common? Lucy at Dreaming Aloud tells us…
  • The Gift of Shared TimeTree at Mom Grooves strives to experience the world from her daughter’s perspective.
  • Follow the GigglesDionna at Code Name: Mama can’t live without the sound of her child’s giggles – come watch her video and you’ll agree!
  • Can I Mommy Without Boob?Emily at Crunchy(ish) Mama shares her fears about weaning and losing part of that the mother/child bond.

About fraurab

A Germanophile, who is figuring out how to build her strengths through improving her mind, body and soul.
This entry was posted in Carnival of Natural Parenting and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to My Other Half

  1. MrsH says:

    I love how you’re recognizing both of your approaches as strengths , even when I’m sure sometimes they create some frustrating moments! I’ve found that one of the most rewarding elements of marriage, to be able to really see one another for the value that person adds. Thanks for sharing!

  2. teresa says:

    It’s such an amazing thing to have a partnership like you and your husband have. I have that in some big ways with my husband and it’s so nice for our daughter to get the benefit of both of our strengths.
    I really relate to being able to relax because of having my husband at my side.
    Great post. I’m so glad you shared this and reminded me to appreciate my partnership a bit more.

  3. Joella says:

    Love this! I feel the same way about my husband, we strike a nice balance with our daughter. After my own experienes, it is such a relief to know that my own daughter has a father who will be there for her through it all and love her unconditionally, involved in her life every step of the way. My next stop is to like your facebook page! :)

  4. My husband and I are very opposite too and I love how this works for us. It was great to read your post and see you thinking in a similar way. So glad it works out for you in an empowering way.

  5. Andrea!!! says:

    I love this! My husband and I also come from differing perspectives, though he tends to be the more cautious one. I find that he’s really grounding, which is good for me, since I can at times be overly optimistic. I think when you come from different places you are able to not only teach your children, but also grow together as a couple – double bonus!!

  6. This is a great perspective. I really appreciate the ways my husband challenges Mikko in different ways than I do. For instance, I’m terrified of knives, so I just leave the room quietly when Sam decides to teach Mikko knife safety. :)

  7. You have so much apreciation for your hubby! What a fabulous example for your children. :) Great post! Thanks for reminding us that differences can be assets, too, not just stumbling blocks! lol

  8. Sometimes I get frustrated that Tom and I can see things from such completely different angles, but you’re right – having differing viewpoints can be an asset in parenting! Thank you for the reminder :)

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